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It's about EFFORT, and nothing else

The lies that have been passed around me have hurt, but I also hurt my back working on my car, and a bad back reminds you not to stoop.  I can't understand why when you run mega-star Rihanna's Twitter account through these programs, she comes back w/ 15 MILLION inactive/fake accounts and then I get shit on because mine says it has 26 thousand.  Actually I am more stunned in the first place that anyone could care about this at all.  There's only one secret to social media: it's about effort. Putting in the effort.  And night after night, unless I am performing somewhere, I'm doing it, someway;  securing TV appearances and booking shows 4-6 months in advance, writing lyrics, writing melodies.  It's all about EFFORT.  As cheesey as some Kid Rock songs are I must quote him in a lyrical context from his song "Only God Knows Why" - I've said it too many times / And I still stand firm / You get what you put in / and people get what thet deserve"


I'm doing my best not to "stoop" to this level - but the truth is FAR from what was posted in a certain person's blog.  This blog claimed that my "ego" was the cause of a band falling apart, when in fact, "ego" had nothing to do with it.  It was a word, however, that started with an "E" but it was not "EGO" -  it was "ETHICS."  It's real tough (sarcasm) to go down anothers musicians' schedule and call every venue and claim some sort of association with them to book yourself after THEIR FATHER THREATENED your girlfriend.  This guy blew it.  All I wanted was a signature that this dude wouldn't screw me over, because I didn't trust him from the start.  And they acted like I asked him for a kidney. THIS WAS A STANDARD INUDSTRY CONTRACT, because I was well aware that he WAS IN THIS TO PROMOTE HIS OWN CAREER.  Took me a whole 10 seconds to figure that out, which is OK I guess, every man for himself; because that's his mentality I guess.  He treated employees of 1 of the 2 shows he played with me terribly. Iron Pigs game.  Lost that one.  Lost gigs there because he chose to stare down the booking person from behind aviator sunglasses when she asked him to turn down his amp.  They agreed to re-book but only if it was just me.  Now, I'm giving him some slack because he's like 22 years old or whatever.  He has a lot to learn, but here's a piece of advice no one else will give him: you don't get anywhere in this business by treating others that way.  No agent will put up with that, and neither would I.  Vandalizing my Wikipedia page??  He's a better guitar player than I am for sure, no question.  But that's NOT all that matters.  What matters is how you treat others.  Talent is part of it, but it's not all of itl it's a piece of the pie.  Not everything.  Fortunately, he has several years to learn this and plenty of time to go down my schedule and bring a mostly underage band w/ him.

I Remember When

I remember when a party was just a party.  Now everything seems so complex.. I need Marty McFly to take me back to 1999
Heres the problem: saving Jane would have put Walt in NO danger at all. Had Jane been cliff diving with Walt and she started to drown or got caught in a riptide, and there was substantial danger to Walt (who was watching from shore) that he, too, would drown if he tried to save her, then it's very clear that it was far too dangerous.

In this case, all Walt had to do was turn her on her side, or help clear her airway. No danger to him whatsoever. He chose not to because either

1) He hated her and what she was doing (to be more specific, blackmail)
2) He wanted Jesse to return to work and thought she was a bad influence. (Walt would make more money)

Or both.

Walt chose to leave her die when a simple movement of his arms and a "wake up wake up" and clearing of her airway would have saved her and most likely, she'd be alive.

I always hated Walt for it and to me THAT is when he really became Heisenberg.. he let someone die by inaction. Sure he would soon murder people with firearms and his car but that's when it started. He let a young woman, who could have done anything she wanted with her life, had she made the effort, die. And it ultimately led to the plane collision. Walt may not have been a medical doctor but common sense for an intelligent chemist (brilliant, according to the plot) would be to save her; he chose his own interests over it. I really liked her character too and felt that she "completed" Jesse's character.

If you recall there was a scene later in the series when Jesse is crying on Walt's shoulder saying "I loved her..... LOVED HER...." and just sobbing.. on the very person who let her pass into the darkness, forever.

I suppose in a sense Vince Gilligan and company succeeded in their "fall from grace" underlying main theme with Cranston's character. I rooted for Walt since day 1 and what he did, well, what the writers did, was turn me against him. He was the protagonists, and has become the antagonist. I'm not exactly rooting for Hank either, as I think the DEA is a bunch of bullshit for the most part, especially in their relentless pursuit and incarcerations of those with marijuana convictions, Skyler I am neutral, the only innocents left are Walt's children. Even Marie had that weird ass episode where she makes up stuff about herself and stole items from open houses. The children are the only ones left. And Jesse. He's on the fence.  Regardless, great show, great season, and I can't wait to see what happens.

State of Florida vs. Zimmerman

So we are getting this alarm system installed tomorrow from a company called Safeway (not the store). it has sensors on all of the ground doors and windows, including garage door and sliding glass door, and infrared motion detection downstairs connected to a bunch of key FOBs (supposedly its ok for pets as long as they don't suddenly grow 4 feet high) and a bunch of other shit.
We already have motion sensing lights in the driveway and front door (I have confirmed the motion light comes on even when you just drive by the house. during testing)
I think I am starting to lose grip of reality but im not sure if it's just me.  she wanted the system too.
we sometimes hear weird noises in the night, but its most always blamed on Jackson, the crazed Siamese cat.  One night, that night our old neighbor threatened me because he thought I egged his car (I didn't and he found out it was some mean girl) - I heard a loud noise, like a door being kicked in.  I looked over and she was still asleep.  I woke her up and told her to get ready to call 911 and I took a flashlight and my 9mm semi-auto with my finger on the trigger, slowly downstairs, heart pounding. it couldn't have been any person, it was either the cat, or an intruder.......... it was in fact the dumb cat.  He was jumping up at the back door trying to catch moths from outside (dumb fucking cat)!!
I don't want to go thru that again, every step you take, your breathing becomes more shallow. and for what it's worth, its NOT like the movies you turn on ALL the lights possible, you don't just go down there randomly in the darkness.  I don't want to feel that feeling again.  so I thought maybe an alarm system with a motion detecting laser would give me some peace of mind. sadly, nothing ever will until the plane is crashing down i'm in or i'm next to or colliding with it.
wtf your thinking right? I really am sane.  maybe not sane but i'm coherent. I know you are judging me now. im sorry.  I chose the worst profession for someone like me-  to be in the public eye... but to be someone that often suspicious, always thinking out scenarios, always worrying. i'm worried about something every minute of everyday, no matter how mundane.  I wish I understood how people didn't do that.
well a 17 year old is dead an a 29 year old is free.  which is better, God only knows.

I wrote this to a girl a few years ago

OK I am going to go into my past a bit here to TRY and explain some things to you about why I am who I am.  it won't be too terribly detailed but i think you will understand.
You see, i had a HORRIFIC 2007 and 2008 has not been so kind either. Well 2008 was better than 2007.  that year was just absolutely terrible. i remember in November of 2006 sitting outside with my then girlfriend at like 2 in the morning.. we were sitting on this enormous rock behind her house. and I said something like "this is cool, i wanna rock". and she goes, "jordan you do rock." it was just the perfect moment.. a dumb silly thing but so important. You have to realize, that at this point, i thought my life had just completely come to fruit you know. we had a successful band about to go out and play all over the east coast, i signed a contract with one of the most coveted music agents on in the music buisness. i felt like I was one in a million, which was something people had been saying to me, but i never believed them until then. and on top of this, i had a great girlfriend and thought i was in love.
and by Christmas.................... it was all gone. being away on the road just screwed everything up.  I came home at Christmas very bitter about everything, I started using heavily and just let it all crash and burn. the band fell apart only a few months later. my mom and stepdad decided to sell their house and move into this one where it had been just my brother and i for a long time, and not that i don't care about my mom or anything, but you know how it is. my problem has never been a lack of people who cared for me. my problem has been mustering whatever it takes to care about them. Wait, nah, that's not really true either. It sounded clever but it's not really true. i was trying to say I have trouble caring about other people and i just said it in an idiotic way, especially because "not caring" isn't really the thing either. i do care a lot. i care about my family and I care about how my friends are doing and I care about whether they're happy or sad or whether there's anything they need or anything I can do to help... i care about a lot of stuff. I don't have a problem with that kind of caring.

I have a HUGE problem with the kind of caring that involves feeling connected to people because that's supposed to be a more consistent thing and it REALLY comes and goes for me. i guess I'm that way about the world in general. there was a period during my oh-so-wonderful year of 2007 where things were starting to become a little unsafe for me.  i remember feeling so dead to myself, i figured i might as well just finish it off.  though i never did anything, i did think about it.  and like i said to you before.. to me, THINKING about doing it is much worse and much sadder than ACTUALLY doing it.  it just depresses the hell out of me to think of someone
Hi everyone.

So I recently had to choose new auto insurance and I chose Progressive. After a 40 minute phone call, the guy asked me if I wanted to participate in their new program "Snapshot" - by then I was hardly paying attention, but I said yes. Here's the lowdown on what "Snapshot" is:

-A small device Progressive sends you that plugs into your vehicle's OBD port (1995 and up vehicles)
-Sends a message to Progressive when first activated
-Saves information about your driving habits: how fast, how many miles, how many start ups, time of day of drive, and most importantly, how many "hard brakes" (more on that below)
-Progressive claims it will save you up to 30 percent on your car insurance premiums
-The person I spoke to at Progressive said it is "quite difficult" to get up to 30 percent in discounts with the Snapshot device

So here's the problem I have with their "Snapshot" program. The "hard braking" thing.  Progressive Insurance, Inc. defines "hard braking" as slowing down 7 MPH or more within a period of 5 seconds or less.  That hardly seems like "hard braking" (pun intended) to me.  The "Snapshot" device has an audible beep that goes off several times when you have engaged the vehicle in what they deem to be "hard braking."  Progressive claims that their research shows that drivers who engage in "hard braking" more often tend to be in more accidents.

So what's the problem?  Well, first, driving in any populated urban region, it is virtually impossible to not have any "hard brakes" during an average 30-40 minute drive.  People pull out in front of you, someone slams on their brakes without using a turn signal, the traffic light goes yellow when you're in "that spot" where you could stop short or hit the gas pedal to make it thru etc..

Progressive Insurance, Inc. says that their "Snapshot" device encourages safe driving, and shows drivers what safe driving is, and encourages safe driving habits.

When you consider that Progressive says you can receive a discount up to 30 percent off of your premiums if you drive safely under their guidelines, and after I drove using Progressive's "Snapshot" device for about 1 month I've noticed this:

1) There is a strong tendency to want to run yellow or "just-about-to-turn-red" traffic lights.  The reason being, Progressive's "Snapshot" device does not penalize you for abrupt acceleration, but they do penalize you for "hard braking" as we discussed.

2) You are more likely to tailgate vehicles in front of you, since you do whatever you can to avoid a "hard brake" and that means you increase the distance over which you have begun to slow down, or stop, which puts you closer to the vehicle in front of you

3) If you live in an urban area with lots and lots of other drivers, or drive during the rush hour, you have no chance

4) "Hard braking" is sort of a mis-nomer.  What if a deer or cat runs in front of you?  Will it cause you to depress the brake pedal a little bit less because you fear hearing that dreaded beep from the "Snapshot" device?  I don't know.
This is the main problem.  Driving, as a rule, can be unpredictable.  We don't usually know when something bad is about to happen, something is about to run across the road unannounced, or someone is about to make a turn without using their turn signal.  That's the whole point.  We just don't know.  And braking, aka "hard braking" - according to Progressive, is usually in the mix somewhere.

5) My friend remarked that when riding in the car with me (while the "Snapshot" device was installed) that driving "feels like a video game."  Remember, this ain't no video game.  This is real life, and driving poorly leads to consequences that can be severe.  I'm afraid that the notion of avoiding the beeping sound will affect my safe driving.  I've competed, legally, racing on 1/4 mile drag strips and on road courses with high tech and highly powered Japanese cars, with relative certainty and appropriate expectations.  Now, I seem more worried driving around my SUV down a regular street with the "Snapshot" device installed, fearing the dreaded "BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP" when, accoring to Progressive, I hit the brakes a little too hard.  That can't be good for concentrating.  At best it will save you money on your premiums, at worst it will cost you nothing, or cost you something.  I don't know.

But I have a mild form of OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and Progressive's "Snapshot" program and device seemingly fits right in with it.  Everytime I drive, I am terrified of hearing the "BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP" that eminates from the device when I've done something wrong, in Progressive's eyes.

Brief conclusion: while Progessive Insurance Co.'s "Snapshot" program may sound good on paper, in reality, it doesn't work very well.  I've only had it for a month, so I'm not sure yet if I will receive discounts due to my driving habits, but the "hard braking" element is ridiculous.

Played our new song "Maybe, Amy" acoustically this morning on WFMZ-TV Channel 69 News with my friend Josh Klein laying down some leads.  You can play & download the actual studio version of the song via the Player App at the very top of http://www.jordanwhitemusic.com if you're interested.

Thanks for watching & listening :) Comments welcomed of course.

How Embarassing!!

In one of my courses yesterday, the instructor was showing us a film on religion.  This class just happened to be right next to another classroom that was ALSO showing a film, at the same time.  But I didn't know this. Read on.

So halfway through it our teacher let our class out for a five minute break.  It was a bit warm inside, so I decided to go outside for fresh air for a few minutes.  Probably just about 5 minutes total.  As I was walking back, quickly up the stairs and to the hallway, I heard a movie playing with the narrarator discussing, yep, you guessed it, religion.  So I had a brief shot of panic, thinking I had stayed on break too long and the class began watching the movie without me, and the teacher was going to be pissed.  Without thinking I darted towards the classroom where the sound of the movie was coming from.. but after I got about halfway towards my "seat" I realized something was wrong.  It was the wrong room.  About 30 students who I had never seen before gave me a blank and confused stare, and probably some of them freaked out because I was basically running.  If someone came running into our classroom at random, I would have probably been alarmed too.

Anyways, my face turned bright red and I abruptly stopped myself, and mumbled something to myself about the "wrong room".


March Comes In Like a Lion

March comes in a like a lion
Goes out like a lamb

Let's hope that holds true this year.  I just turned on CNN and saw that the tornadoes over the weekened killed THIRTY-NINE PEOPLE.  Stunned.  Can't believe it.  One minute you're sitting in your house, or sleeping in your house, or your office building, the next minute it's lights out.  And we still can't predict where they will hit.  We can predict when conditions are favorable, but not exactly where they will hit.  We probably never will.  This spring/summer, I'm going to get that chill down my spine every time I hear the sound of distant thunder.  Even if it's just a mild evening storm passing thru. But these last two years with the tornados have been unlike anything I can remember.