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There is a highway in eastern PA called route 22 and it sucks.  I was driving home on it after last night's show, around midnight and BAM, horrible noise and car shuddering like hell, I manage to pull to the shoulder. keep in mind it is 18 degrees. and route 22 has tractor trailers whizzing by me at 70MPH 10 feet away and its pitch black.

I get out and walk around the car trying to figure out WTF happened, hoping its a tire and not an axle or something, and I see the passenger side rear tire is DONE. I mean separated from the rim, completely destroyed. I have no idea what the hell happened. It had like 70 percent tread left too.

No real biggie, I think - I have a full spare w/ me. I kill the engine, put the 4 ways on and start jacking it up, remove the wheel, and put on the spare, after about 15 minutes of using my iPhone 6 for a flashlight.. little I did I know the phone was almost dead.. but thats not all that was dead. I get everything back together, and the CAR WONT START. Battery died because the headlights and flashers were on for 20 minutes with the motor off in the cold weather (battery was already on its last legs).

I think for a second, OK what to do now? I pick up the phone to call my mom, and it SHUTS THE FUCK OFF. iPhones do NOT like cold weather. I turn it back on and it has that "connect to power" symbol. So, I'm FUCKED and now have to figure out WTF to do. Im sitting on the side of the highway with the spare on, flashers on, but cant get it started with a dead phone. I have jumper cables in my car. So I start walking down towards the other way trying to flag someone down to help me - everyone just moved to the left lane and keeps going. Its too dark, and I decide to end that quickly out of fear of being killed. so I go back to the car and think. I look to my right and there's a barbed fence, and I can see a Weis's ar far away and realize it's the same Weis's that, coincidentally, is about 2 miles from my moms house.

So I weigh my options. Dead phone, dead battery, its 18 degrees. I'm going to freeze and I have all my sound equipment including my $2,000 guitar in the backseat. So I decide I'm going to climb the barbed wire fence and go for help, or to her house if I have to.

I lock the doors to my car, grab my wallet, keys, and dead phone, and go for the fence. I cut the FUCK out of my hand but I got over it after like 4 attempts. I fell to the other side of the ground right on my back.  I start jogging and the first houses I see I knock on the door but no one answers (I suppose not many people do these days at that time of night) - and then I realize I'm only about 4 miles away from mom's actual house, so I start jogging, and jogging, the entire way, thru parking lots and yards, over smaller fences, until I finally get to moms street. I'm completely frozen, my face is frozen, hands, everything.
I run up to my moms door and ring the doorbell. She comes down half asleep in a robe freaking out thinking something happened. I explain the situation and that I need her to drive us to my car and jump mine so I can get it home.  We get to my car on, she ulls up right behind me (my battery is relocated in the trunk) - she pops her hood, and the fucking hood is broken and won't stay up. So I'm using my head to hold it up while trying to find her battery. Well, the geniuses at Pontiac decided to hide her battery under this giant ass plastic thing that you need to remove three screws to access. Luckily I have my tools with me, as always, and the trucks continue to go by at 70MPH,  I remove the screws and jump my car and that was that.  She followed me til she made sure I was OK and I'm home now, with frostbite
So how was your night? haha.
Man oh man.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 21st, 2016 12:34 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you at least got home okay. How scary and annoying that must have been.
Dec. 21st, 2016 06:05 pm (UTC)
Jesus christ, I'm glad it turned out okay.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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